Halloween may be coming in a few days, but for the Jewish people, for me, ghosts of those millions of murdered Jews — including the new arrivals from two weeks ago, welcome! — are always haunting me.
Oct 20, 2023·edited Oct 20, 2023Liked by Zibby Owens
This was spot on; I’m grateful to you for writing it. As a 60 year old secular American Jew whose great grandmother was murdered by Nazis in 1942 in Ukraine (she never made it to the camps; she was just marched out to the forest and forced to dig her own grave), I was told the stories again and again by my dad. I was also told: the world will hate you because you are a Jew. I didn’t believe him; he was right. Over the years, I’ve sent money to feed children on both sides of the border; I’ve regularly been part of literary and culinary peace efforts. And yet, after the events of the 7th, I heard everything: that the value of Jewish lives is inconsequential. That maybe the attacks were staged. (This reminded me of the far right wing who said that the Sandy Hook shooting in my town also never happened.) Most of all, I heard nothing. Silence. People I love never checked in with me, even though a family member was supposed to be at the rave and decided not to go at the last minute. This is an issue of humanity: reach out to the people in your life who are in pain. Let them know you’re there. The first person to
contact me was a half-Palestinian friend with a teenage son. We wept together. What will happen to this world. Make no mistake: this was our Kristallnacht. In some places it has been a literary and social Kristallnacht. In other places, it was just pure unadulterated Jew-hating with a rationale. Nothing more, nothing less.
Sending you hugs. I love that you cried with a half-Palestinian friend. I love that you have sent money to both sides. I love that you hold space for love of the human heart and soul no matter which side of the fence it is born on. I was thinking about the quote "We all pee the same at Langly" and I was thinking, we all poop that same too, and so much propaganda has been shot at people, but from different directions, because the goal is to divide, to teach us to fear and hate one another. And so I really think love is the answer. Not to be cliche, but the deep, deep love. We must refuse the othering.
"The fear of “your Jewish friends” as all the Instagram posts are calling us, who you’re supposed to “check in on” like we have a cold or something, is rooted deeply in thousands of years of history." it's all too much to bear right now. This is all beautifully put and horrifically prescient at the same time. Sending love as a fellow tribeswoman on the west coast.
Thank you for this excellent, thoughtful, painful, and urgent post--a plea for understanding and a challenge to action, rather than simply thoughts and prayers.
I remember as a teenager marching against the Vietnam War and making myself choose what I would do if I was drafted (go to jail, flee to Canada, join the army?) -- as if I were male. My sex allowed a safe place then just as my non-Jewish background allows a safe place today. I know that.
After 9/11, I remember telling my grade school children that not all Arab people were attacking the World Trade Center. I did my best to explain to them “why the terrorists hate us” while also standing against the atrocity of that murder of innocent civilians on our soil. 9/11 was also the 60th anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbor--both of my parents were on the naval base in Hawaii when the bombs fell. I remember thanking god my father died two months before 9/11 and he didn’t have to watch the WTC attack over and over. But as my mother said...”the World Trade Center was nothing like Pearl Harbor. We were at war back then and it was an attack on a navy base. 9/11 was an attack on innocent civilians.”
The suffering of the Palestinian people offers NO excuse for the nightmare Israeli families everywhere are experiencing now, despite the Israel government’s mistakes in the past or the future.
I will protect my Jewish friends and work for their safety. At the same time, I also pray for restraint when it comes to attacking innocent Palestinians. I believe I can hold both positions simultaneously.
Thank you for your honest and deep words. I feel this in my soul. It’s really all incomprehensible to me; yet I see history and it playing out in real time. I don’t know what to say and do except to keep learning and trying and comforting. Your words help to provide more shape and substance to something that is hard to wrap my head around.
My parents lived as Crypto-Jews in the fanatical Iranian city of Mashhad. Generational trauma has definitely surfaced as I witness Anti-Semitism rear it’s ugly head here in the States.
Thank you Zibby. Very well said and sadly a bolder move than it should be. EVERYONE should be saying this - everyone should be outraged. And you are right - we have been prepping for this our entire lives.
As a Christian I believe, as many others do, that we have been called to love one another. To me, this is not just a platitude, yet it can sound hollow and practiced. What then is this calling? Who are we, with whom do we share these words and why? Words in themselves are not acceptable, inaction speaks loudly. So what are we to do?
This is not social media where at the push of a button one can virtually “love” another person. You should not be able to count your friends or followers. Loving one another is a lifetime commitment. To love is to care, to lift up others, to be ever available in times of crisis and times of tranquility. Everyday there are opportunities to hold open your heart as you would hold open a door. As to who is to blame in these recent times? We are if we continue to turn a blind eye and leave love to fend for itself.
Zibby, thank you for this. It helps non-Jewish people understand a little more. My husband is Jewish, and therefore, my kids are, too. I've been flat-footed since October 7, not knowing what to do, how to react. I still don't, not really, but reading your note is the closest I've come to walking a few steps in my Jewish friends' and family's shoes.
My thanks to you. You said everything I was feeling and thinking, and you did it eloquently. I am reposting and sending to people. And sending you love, too.
Oct 20, 2023·edited Oct 20, 2023Liked by Zibby Owens
Zibby, I am praying for healing of all. No child, no mother deserves to have to live into how to live with this level of trauma, on any side. I was born in a Sufi commune. My dad is Jewish. Do you use Dr. Bronner's by chance? Emmanuel Bronner lost much of his family in the holocaust, and that inspired his ALL-ONE soaps! We must heal the trauma in ourselves, wherever it is in our lineages, whether Jewish or Roma or Armenian or Palestinian or Indigenous or Black or...on and on. We are not alone in experiencing genocide. We must come together as a humanity!
Thank you so much for this, Zibby. I wrote a pretty raw post last week (with a very similar title to yours!) and felt like I was the only one in my Substack world feeling these things. And now it’s only gotten worse. I hope everyone reads this and shares. Sending love and strength from my Jewish family to yours. ✊
We don’t wear our Jewishness on our skin, but somehow evil still knows how to find us. Which “outsider” friends can we trust? It’s a big ask. Who are they really? Deep down? I’m not Israeli. I’m blonde haired and blue eyed. 23 and me says I’m 99.9% Jewish. Evil cannot stereotype me. Yet, I exist.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings. I feel like there’s so much to say and yet I have no words. I have a lot of family in Israel and fortunately, all are safe. What we are witnessing is incomprehensible. Thank you for being vocal of your support for Israel.
This was spot on; I’m grateful to you for writing it. As a 60 year old secular American Jew whose great grandmother was murdered by Nazis in 1942 in Ukraine (she never made it to the camps; she was just marched out to the forest and forced to dig her own grave), I was told the stories again and again by my dad. I was also told: the world will hate you because you are a Jew. I didn’t believe him; he was right. Over the years, I’ve sent money to feed children on both sides of the border; I’ve regularly been part of literary and culinary peace efforts. And yet, after the events of the 7th, I heard everything: that the value of Jewish lives is inconsequential. That maybe the attacks were staged. (This reminded me of the far right wing who said that the Sandy Hook shooting in my town also never happened.) Most of all, I heard nothing. Silence. People I love never checked in with me, even though a family member was supposed to be at the rave and decided not to go at the last minute. This is an issue of humanity: reach out to the people in your life who are in pain. Let them know you’re there. The first person to
contact me was a half-Palestinian friend with a teenage son. We wept together. What will happen to this world. Make no mistake: this was our Kristallnacht. In some places it has been a literary and social Kristallnacht. In other places, it was just pure unadulterated Jew-hating with a rationale. Nothing more, nothing less.
Beautifully said. ❤️
Sending you hugs. I love that you cried with a half-Palestinian friend. I love that you have sent money to both sides. I love that you hold space for love of the human heart and soul no matter which side of the fence it is born on. I was thinking about the quote "We all pee the same at Langly" and I was thinking, we all poop that same too, and so much propaganda has been shot at people, but from different directions, because the goal is to divide, to teach us to fear and hate one another. And so I really think love is the answer. Not to be cliche, but the deep, deep love. We must refuse the othering.
Thank you. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
"The fear of “your Jewish friends” as all the Instagram posts are calling us, who you’re supposed to “check in on” like we have a cold or something, is rooted deeply in thousands of years of history." it's all too much to bear right now. This is all beautifully put and horrifically prescient at the same time. Sending love as a fellow tribeswoman on the west coast.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you Zibby. I hear the alarms. Where can we go? Where is safe?
I don’t know. That’s the scariest part.
Thank you for this excellent, thoughtful, painful, and urgent post--a plea for understanding and a challenge to action, rather than simply thoughts and prayers.
I remember as a teenager marching against the Vietnam War and making myself choose what I would do if I was drafted (go to jail, flee to Canada, join the army?) -- as if I were male. My sex allowed a safe place then just as my non-Jewish background allows a safe place today. I know that.
After 9/11, I remember telling my grade school children that not all Arab people were attacking the World Trade Center. I did my best to explain to them “why the terrorists hate us” while also standing against the atrocity of that murder of innocent civilians on our soil. 9/11 was also the 60th anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbor--both of my parents were on the naval base in Hawaii when the bombs fell. I remember thanking god my father died two months before 9/11 and he didn’t have to watch the WTC attack over and over. But as my mother said...”the World Trade Center was nothing like Pearl Harbor. We were at war back then and it was an attack on a navy base. 9/11 was an attack on innocent civilians.”
The suffering of the Palestinian people offers NO excuse for the nightmare Israeli families everywhere are experiencing now, despite the Israel government’s mistakes in the past or the future.
I will protect my Jewish friends and work for their safety. At the same time, I also pray for restraint when it comes to attacking innocent Palestinians. I believe I can hold both positions simultaneously.
Thank you for sharing your experiences. ❤️
Thank you for your honest and deep words. I feel this in my soul. It’s really all incomprehensible to me; yet I see history and it playing out in real time. I don’t know what to say and do except to keep learning and trying and comforting. Your words help to provide more shape and substance to something that is hard to wrap my head around.
I’m so glad it helped. ❤️
I'm so grateful for the work you're doing. Thank you for using your platform to elevate Jewish voices.
❤️
💖💖💖💖 We will not let this happen again!!
🩷🩷
Bravo Zibby!!!
For speaking up so honestly.
My parents lived as Crypto-Jews in the fanatical Iranian city of Mashhad. Generational trauma has definitely surfaced as I witness Anti-Semitism rear it’s ugly head here in the States.
Thank you for sharing. ❤️
Thank you Zibby. Very well said and sadly a bolder move than it should be. EVERYONE should be saying this - everyone should be outraged. And you are right - we have been prepping for this our entire lives.
Yes. We need to band together and make sure everyone is fully aware of what’s happening.
As a Christian I believe, as many others do, that we have been called to love one another. To me, this is not just a platitude, yet it can sound hollow and practiced. What then is this calling? Who are we, with whom do we share these words and why? Words in themselves are not acceptable, inaction speaks loudly. So what are we to do?
This is not social media where at the push of a button one can virtually “love” another person. You should not be able to count your friends or followers. Loving one another is a lifetime commitment. To love is to care, to lift up others, to be ever available in times of crisis and times of tranquility. Everyday there are opportunities to hold open your heart as you would hold open a door. As to who is to blame in these recent times? We are if we continue to turn a blind eye and leave love to fend for itself.
Beautiful.
Zibby, thank you for this. It helps non-Jewish people understand a little more. My husband is Jewish, and therefore, my kids are, too. I've been flat-footed since October 7, not knowing what to do, how to react. I still don't, not really, but reading your note is the closest I've come to walking a few steps in my Jewish friends' and family's shoes.
So glad it helped!
My thanks to you. You said everything I was feeling and thinking, and you did it eloquently. I am reposting and sending to people. And sending you love, too.
❤️
Zibby, I am praying for healing of all. No child, no mother deserves to have to live into how to live with this level of trauma, on any side. I was born in a Sufi commune. My dad is Jewish. Do you use Dr. Bronner's by chance? Emmanuel Bronner lost much of his family in the holocaust, and that inspired his ALL-ONE soaps! We must heal the trauma in ourselves, wherever it is in our lineages, whether Jewish or Roma or Armenian or Palestinian or Indigenous or Black or...on and on. We are not alone in experiencing genocide. We must come together as a humanity!
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/descendants-of-holocaust-survivors-have-altered-stress-hormones/
❤️
<3
Thank you so much for this, Zibby. I wrote a pretty raw post last week (with a very similar title to yours!) and felt like I was the only one in my Substack world feeling these things. And now it’s only gotten worse. I hope everyone reads this and shares. Sending love and strength from my Jewish family to yours. ✊
Sorry -- I didn’t see yours!!
Thank you, Zibby.
We don’t wear our Jewishness on our skin, but somehow evil still knows how to find us. Which “outsider” friends can we trust? It’s a big ask. Who are they really? Deep down? I’m not Israeli. I’m blonde haired and blue eyed. 23 and me says I’m 99.9% Jewish. Evil cannot stereotype me. Yet, I exist.
The haters don’t care how religious you are or any of it. And they know.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings. I feel like there’s so much to say and yet I have no words. I have a lot of family in Israel and fortunately, all are safe. What we are witnessing is incomprehensible. Thank you for being vocal of your support for Israel.
You’re welcome. ❤️